Thursday, March 24, 2005

Introduction (To my SEO-blog, 'Land of the Big Wingy-Dingy')

[Added to Mad Science Writer on March 18, 2013.]

Hi, this is S E E Quine, the self-appointed Big Wingy-Dingy.

Of course, I have no idea what the Ramifications of This are, as I have no idea of what the office of Big Wingy-Dingy is.
` I’m Not a Very Happy Wingy-Dingy right now, though. I just worked for five hours Figuring Out a First Post here. And then Something Bad happened when I clicked on the Blog This! button; the post went Out of the Land of The Big Wingy-Dingy, so you see, it’s Sadly Gone.

I can tell you that it started with me stating that my name is known only to Those Who Are Brave Enough to Enter My Presence. One of Those was actually licking my fingers as I typed and saying; ‘Prrrrowww! Miaow! Yeauuurrrrr!’ and Similarly Carrying On.
` I explained that this was My New Pouncing, Pinkish Bundle of Allergens, Butter Cookies.
` I said that I would like to be a Good Sci-Fi author one day, one that has lots of Observations about the State of the World, without any Pseudoscience or Campiness.
` Then I announced that I would post many things of Pure Intellect which if I was Wrong About, one could Lambaste Me. 

` I often get them from the famous scientific journal, Nature, because they send me several E-Mails every day! (By the way, Butter Cookies thinks my fingers are absolutely delicious right now.)
Examples of Weird Things I would like to Talk About:

MEART: Besides being one of those deals where a bunch of brain cells is hooked up to a computer, it specifically has a camera and an arm by which it draws pictures of what it ‘sees.’ Disturbing!

Plasmonic covers: They’re really cool, but as large-scale invisibility shields, these things are Rather Disappointing in Visible Light.

VIRGOHI21: The Dark Matter Galaxy. Well something has to be hauling that nebula around!

Homo floresiensis: Bizarre mutant? No. Pygmy Homo erectus? No. Hobbit? Not really. Ebu Gogo? Somewhat plausible… [But only slightly more than 'Hobbit'.]

Also: What do I Think about Things? (Possibly much more interesting than it sounds.)

That’s what I like to share with people (and rarely ever do)!
` Then, after that, I went on to mention that my Laptop with my Sci-Fi novel on it was stolen one day, along with my diaries and all other imaginable personal belongings – underwear, photo album, bicycle – by a psychotic nut.
` He took them all the way across the country (from Ohio) to Las Vegas. The novel was the only thing I ever got back. Well, that was my only Future Resource Anyway, so I guess that turned out As Well as it Could Have.
` Then, I said that the obsessive lunatic who did it used to live with me in Medina, Ohio. Why? Because he was my dad!

I had written; ‘It explains why I rode the short bus to school.’

Then I noted that his incident fortunately marked the end of my childhood - as I was only eighteen at the time - and then, Things Got Better. After a few years, They Got Worse Again because I was tortured once and while imprisoned in a Place of Horrors afterwards, wondered if I would bleed to death, since being Cut to the Bone and then Not Being Allowed to see a doctor afterward makes one think that.
` It was a Very Grisly Episode, though, and I had written; you don’t need (and probably don’t want) to know any more right now, though I will mention that I have lots of Annoying Symptoms of Sorts such as moderate numbness all over my body (including places like my tongue, meaning I can’t taste very well), not to mention One Long Constant Headache.

Now I'm recovering from that, on top of Everything Else. Then in the post I described how - exactly a year after the Very Grisly Episode - my Katie-Kitty, my Happy-Cat, my Tabby-ssinian, took a road trip across the country with me. We toured several states, and she didn’t even flinch when she saw Old Faithful. My mom and her friend Rosie came along, too, because it was a Very Long Way for me to go just with my cat.
` I joked that my dad would be furious if he knew about this because he believes that they are two of several Evil Witches who cast Spells of Death on him. That’s probably why he sent Very Obvious Police Spies after my mom after she kicked him out.
` At the end of the trip, I'd said, I moved into a place in Everett, Washington. Why? Because there is a Great Guy Named Phil who also got a Great Job at Boeing just after he graduated from Ohio State. He had also been my boyfriend* for four years, so I followed him out there.
` What the heck?
` It’s been six months and we still haven’t killed each other, or really even gotten into a fight. From the first day I moved in, it was like we’d been married for several years - without the sex and everything! Not too long ago, we got an opportunity to Move Early Without Paying Fees because the Management had Screwed Up.
` We now live downtown, and in our backyard is Possession Sound. I was describing how I could see the beautiful sunset behind the Olympic Mountains, and the giant, glowing 72 of the USS Abraham Lincoln (which, not too long ago, had an F-18 on deck). Out front, above the seagull-teeming city, the moon was shining and Largely Full.

(Prior to this, however, Katie-Kitty had unfortunately Died Suddenly, being the sort of thing many fifteen-year-old cats do, just as we were about to pack up and move. She would have loved the seagulls! That’s why we have Butter Cookies now, who was just in here licking my hands again.)

I had also been wondering when Phil was going to come back from kite-flying at the beach when he came in the door and shortly made dinner. He said; ‘You won’t believe this, but I ruined Mexican!’ and I said; ‘I’ve still done it more times than you!’ and then we dug in, just the same. And no, I really don’t think he ruined it. I Ate it All!

If anyone can find something to Comment About, though probably not on this post, I will receive a sound-effect from my e-mail system every time that happens. So I will be Keeping an Ear out if Anyone Cares.
Solar Radiation and Narcissus sp.!

*under my definition, not his.
Indeed, the SEO Blog post received several comments:

Hey! Sa-ra, Sa-ra
Darn, I miss you mucho' bunches. And, I can't wait to read your out-of-this-world BLOG! (Guess I'd better hurry up before it takes me six months to follow the thread) Huh?
Putting your BLOG in "My Favorite Place" ( does that rate at Portnoy talk?) And, where IS my favorite place, you ask? . . .Tune in for more or less of the oldest vestial virgin's nonsensical nonsense regarding her harried,and ubiquitous thoughts of meanness and revenge. In the meantime, I hereby officially LAUNCH "THE LAND OF THE WINGY DINGY BLOG" (Gee, I wish I had a cookie)XO

D | 27/03/2005, 02:07

YOU DARE SPEAK MY NAME, Head Honcho of Writers Club! (It is only because you have an Impressive Title, like myself!) I shall speak YOUR NAME - DORY! Now everyone knows who you are! HA HA HA! And if you EVER CROSS ME, I shall refer to you as Dori - with an 'i'! Mua ha ha!
Seriously, though! How ya been? :D How's everybody? How's the property? How's the dogs? How's the festering? Thanks very much for the launch! I suppose you could have used a bottle of champagne, or at least cheap vodka to smash against it, but your way is better!
(And if you wish for cookies, at least you have Chrissy there.)
Keep being Cool and Weird! XO - Q

seequine | 27/03/2005, 10:02

The rest of the comments, however, consist of spam. And no crackers, either!

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