Monday, August 4, 2014

There's so much I need to catch up on, where to start? How about...

Not only is my computer currently connected to the internet, but it's fast enough to access my unpublished drafts -- for months I was worried that they had been erased because the 'posts' page wouldn't load up. I can't say how often I will have a stable connection, but when I do, it makes blogging so much simpler.*

There's so much to write about, including my trip to The Amazing Meeting, what I've learned about hypnosis, the crazy drama coming at me from all angles, and what I've been doing to avoid losing my mind and being without a place to live or transportation.

My daily life in an 8-person dwelling continues to be rough, but at least I don't have to maintain a sizeable grow-op while preventing the death of an incoherent, abusive partner who emotionally blackmailed me out of blogging, taking care of my health, getting out of the house to save my sanity, contacting other people to maintain my counterstories, etc.

As far as writing goes, I'm so overwhelmed with material and may need a while to pick through my blog drafts and notes in order to figure out the optimal next post.

Believe it or not, it was Karl Kruzelnicki who got me to realize that I need not feel ashamed of needing to take so long to write anything, and that this is not a sign of some 'mental illness' as I was led to believe.

And so, I am standing up, with my laptop balanced at just the right height for my hands to type without straining the tendons in my wrists.

It's strange what posture does to one's mind -- I've spent the past year and a half doing physical rehab for injuries I've had most of my life, and it's done wonders for my attitude!

For example, one's glutei maximi are supposed to be around the side of grapefruits, but mine (on the citrus glute scale) were the size of a lemon and a lime in 2012. Walking and standing were always a struggle, even with an hour of cardio a day, because I was building up the wrong muscles!

Atrophied glutes are literally the center of my foot/ankle/hip/shoulder/neck problems, and building them up to normal size allows me to stand up and walk straight, with hardly any limping or cowering. When my muscles are firing more normally, I don't feel the emotional instability, fear and defensiveness because I'm not struggling to hold myself up physically.

My left foot can now plant almost normally, as long as I keep grinding the deforming callus off, and that keeps my hips and knees at the right angles. But enough of that nonsense!

Anyway, I'm standing now because I refuse to sit down to write, simply because all the seats and chairs around the house are little more than one foot high, and I can no longer tolerate sitting either with my knees crunched up or my legs stretched across the floor -- it has both musculoskeletal and emotional effects.

Yes, it is possible to stack objects on top of chairs, however it is difficult to maintain my balance, especially since the chairs are not level. If I'm going to sit, I need to have my feet flat on the floor and to be able to sit up straight like I teach my muscles to do every day in rehab.

Speaking of rehab, I'm about to leave to get a new gym membership. When I get back, I'll continue writing, but about things other than my ass making me feel empowered.

[Edit: August 9th I found a chair on the side of the road that's of the right height, and isn't even broken, so enough with all this standing nonsense! My feet are much happier as well. :-) ]

*My normal methodology is to either start by researching on the internet, or to start writing about something I have been learning about otherwise until I run into uncertainty. Then, I do more internet research until I realize how unimaginative and inaccurate my post would have been if I had just kept writing without bothering to learn more.

Basically, I alternate between writing and checking until my original post has been massively re-written for both accuracy and interestingness. Whilst I'm doing this, I copy and paste a lot of links, photos, quotes, and add other formatting, which is a real chore to type in manually when I'm getting it from another form of internet access.

Such as my iPhone, which has a very slow 3G connection and won't load up half the websites I want to look at. But wait, Spoony, didn't you get a Galaxy tablet that you said you would be using to surf the interwebs while homeless? Yes -- and I've never been able to connect it to the internet!

So yes, while it is possible to type up a blog post on a word processor that isn't directly connected to the internet, it's vastly simpler and easier when it is. Especially when my brain is addled from my living situation -- hence I spend a lot of time away from the house!

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